Funeral for a Forty-four-year-old Friend

This Monday and Tuesday I attended a wake and funeral for a forty-four-year-old friend, I had not met before, who ended his life.

I was present to support the surviving members of the family, to pray for the deceased, and to pray for my contemporaries, in mid-life, who are struggling with personal pain and unremitting challenges.

I offered the survivors the silent support of our home-gardens and 15 Stations, as well as my personal pastoral-care and listening support, as they work through their experiences of grief and adjust to their loss.

For individuals, couples, and families who may benefit from education and support with this topic, I offer the post I wrote in April:

U.S. Suicide Rate Report and Rest.Stop.Ranch Support >

For Christians and others interested in the priest’s homily, I offer a brief summary below. Rev. Father Joe Bachand made three points. The words here are from the notes I scribed as I witnessed him speaking them. Although partial and incomplete, they may offer readers of this blog some comfort.

1. All of us are wounded. The first thing is to accept (our wounds). That is where the healing is the strongest. At the point of the wound life enters us. The Body of Christ is wounded. It’s not just us as individuals.

2. Love is powerless. It doesn’t change the people we want it to change. (For Christians) the man on a cross is a sign of powerlessness. A mother in tears is another sign of powerlessness. Still, Love endures. Love perseveres. In the mutuality of relationship… there’s hope in the power of Love to endure.

3. Remember in the hope of resurrection. We believe in the resurrection. For everybody who has left this world, (we pray) You receive them into Your Light. All of them. We pray that’s where we’re all headed. We’re only going to get there holding each other’s hands.

Moving forward with a listening heart,
vision, inquiry, and action,
~ Mary

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